Do It Myself Blog – Glenda Watson Hyatt

(Photo credit: Ralaenin)

It has been one of those weeks!

Since releasing my autobiography I’ll Do It Myself last December, I’ve also wanted to offer an electronic version, an ebook, to reach more readers. Sounds simple enough. Many people are selling ebooks; some are making a sizeable income by selling them

The first step was to learn how to create accessible PDFs (portable document format – a common file format of ebooks). I finally had time to learn this while I was preparing a web accessibility training session for a local municipal government in June. Step one done, finally!

The next step was to figure out how to make it downloadable via PayPal. I had done some research, but didn’t have a clear, step-by-step process in mind. It appears many people are selling ebooks, but aren’t revealing the necessary steps; at least, not for free that I had found yet.

My goal was to have the ebook available for sale this week, in time for kicking off my Summer Sojourn virtual book tour on Monday. It is now Thursday night, the ebook is not yet available online and I am running low on chocolate!

Frustration : a deep chronic sense or state of insecurity and dissatisfaction arising from unresolved problems or unfulfilled needs

Deep dissatisfaction arising from unresolved problems – that pretty much covers it! But, the real question is: how will I cope with this frustration?

With a low frustration tolerance, some people give up when facing discomfort and struggle. Their frustration leads to lethargy, a lack of discipline, helplessness and hopelessness, and they focus on short-term discomfort rather than on long-term goals and rewards. Whereas, other individuals with patience and tolerance will persevere through their frustration and solve their problems. How do they deal with their frustration?

Techniques for dealing with frustration:

1. Repeat affirmations, like “Even though I dislike frustration, I can survive it.” (More frustration-tolerant affirmations
2. Break task into smaller goals and then reward yourself.Chocolate works for me!
3. Take breaks to recover energy and to gain a new insight or perspective. Surprising how many brilliant ideas strike while I’m in the shower!
4. Ask for help!
5. Release your emotions through exercise, deep breathing, talking with friend or, my personal favourite, watching a sappy movie. For some unexplainable reason, this video of the adult lion reuniting with her human caretakers did it for me this week. (Does anyone know if this is Elsa, on which the movie Born Free was based?)

Tomorrow I will take another look at the pieces and figure out how they go together. The ebook may not be available when I had hoped, but it will be available soon!

All that is necessary to break the spell of inertia and frustration is to — act as if it were impossible to fail.
~Dorothea Brande

If you enjoyed this post, consider buying me a chai tea latte. Thanks kindly.

(Photo credit: John Evans)

A young millionairess is caught speeding at night with her headlights turned off and with a suspended driver’s license. According to the media, she does not know her license has been suspended because she doesn’t read her own mail and she doesn’t read everything she signs. She blames her manager for her predicament. This woman is physically capable, but is she independent?

A long list of abilities does not equate to independence. An individual with a severe disability, requiring assistance with daily tasks, can be more independent than a more capable individual. Independence is a state of mind rather than a state of physical ability.

Developing independence is a process, a journey, that begins at an early age; most notably, during the terrible twos with the stubborn word “NO!” Occasionally that journey is hampered or blocked for various reasons. Here are a few ways to revive that journey, regardless of capabilities, financial status or other situation.

1. Be responsible and take responsibility. Being accountable for your actions and owning up when you have made a mistake or a poor judgement are critical in declaring your independence.
2. Make your own decisions. Soliciting advice and insights from others may be helpful when facing a decision, but, in the end, it comes down to you. It’s your life, your decision.
3. Be willing to try. You may pleasantly surprise yourself (and others) with what you can do yourself.
4. Use capabilities to full potential. Not fully using what you do have may mean you are unnecessarily depending on others for something you could competently do yourself.
5. Communicate what you need. No man is an island…we all need to rely on others in some way. However, by communicating your needs and how you need them, rather than depending on others to guess or fumble along, you take further responsibility for yourself
6. Use resources appropriately. As mentioned in #5, we all need assistance from time to time, but utilize the assistance or resource for its intended purpose. Seeking legal advice from your manager or overextending your stay on your friend’s couch doesn’t foster self-reliance.

Are there other ways for developing one’s independence? Add your thoughts in a comment below.

(Photo credit: Jeff Hallam)

Growing up labeled as “functionally non-verbal”, I only spoke to those close to me; those who were patient with Glenda-ish. It wasn’t that I didn’t have anything to say to other people (oftentimes, quite the opposite!); it was simply easier to remain non-verbal. Although it was frustrating many times, it was comfortable. I wasn’t expected to give a class presentation or an oral report; a written assignment was an acceptable substitute.

Every so often in life, if you are lucky, situations or opportunities come along that stretch your comfort zone beyond recognition and leaves you with abilities or talents that you didn’t know were within you. Such an opportunity presented itself to me in April, 2005, when I was asked to speak at the Social Planning and Research Council of British Columbia’s (SPARC BC), “Beyond the Obvious: Exploring the Accessible Community Dialogue”. As I shared in my autobiography I’ll Do It Myself:

My initial thought was But I don’t give speeches. I can’t. Since I was raised without the word “can’t “in my vocabulary, that was a fleeing thought. I quickly turned my thought to How can I do this?

I had been using the free computer software ReadPlease for a couple of years to proofread my writing. ReadPlease reads aloud text that is copied into the program. I thought, Maybe I could put ReadPlease onto my laptop and have it read aloud my speech for me. I hesitantly agreed to speak. Unsure if the technology would work, I took a printed copy of the speech with me, in case I needed someone else to read it on my behalf.

Finally, it was my turn to take the stage. Being on stage alone for the first time in my life, with two hundred eyes staring at me, I wanted to run. But, I didn’t. I gave my speech. When I was done, I left the stage, trembling. I had given my first ever speech! And the technology worked!

Afterwards something amazing happened. For the rest of the day people actually came up to me and spoke with me. I was heard for the first time. I was no longer invisible, no longer silent. It was an amazing, unexplainable feeling that I would like to experience again. I would like to give more speeches. I would like to be heard again.

This first speech pushed me beyond my comfort zone. The days and moments leading up to my speech were terrifying. I knew my athetoid cerebral palsy would kick into high gear and my head control would vanish, leaving me bobbing for invisible apples. But, because I took the risk, I experienced a moment that I would not have had otherwise. And, I realized something about myself: that I could present a speech AND survive. Perhaps the apple bobbing wasn’t quite as bad as I feared.

At the end of June, I am offering a web accessibility training session for the Information Technology (IT) staff for a local city – another first for me. I am scared; this is so far out of my comfort zone. But, I know I will survive and that it will be an amazing feeling when I come out on the other side. And, it could quite possibly open doors that I do not know even exist yet.

Taking the risk to try something pushes us out of our known comfort zone and forces us to grow and to realize awesome things about ourselves. Stretching beyond our comfort zone is when dreams are reached.

What first can you take to expand your comfort zone to reach your dream?

(Photo credit: Anatoli Styf)

Since wrapping up my “40 Blogs in 40 (Business) Days” virtual book tour for my autobiography I’ll Do It Myself, I have been down with bronchitis. This bout has really sucked the energy out of me. With my cerebral palsy, nearly everything I do takes extra conscious effort, which tends to limit the energy I do have. This limited energy combined with the power surge from the bronchitis has left me doing the bare minimum for the past few weeks.

I find this “dead battery” feeling extremely frustrating because, even though I physically feel like doing nothing, my mind is still racing with ideas, plans and all the things I have to do. I then remind myself that, like everyone else, I am a not a human doing, but rather a human being. It is okay to sit mindlessly at my window and watch the birds build their nest; it’s okay to spend a couple of hours during the work day reading in bed – I may even finish reading April’s O Magazine before May’s issue arrives! Except for meals and minimal laundry, pretty much everything else really can wait.

Surely my book tour hosts won’t mind receiving their thank you notes later rather than sooner. The ebook about the lessons I learned from doing a virtual book tour can wait another month or so to be written. Revenue Canada, on the other hand, won’t really wait beyond the end of April for income taxes, so that becomes my top priority. What a priority! Other things, like drumming up votes for the Best of Blog Award, fall off the priority list. Although winning the award would be nice and would give Darrell and I a reason/excuse for going to Las Vegas, something we’ve been talking about doing for a few years, the award won’t change how I blog, and I doubt it would change my life’s larger picture.

Life involves constantly readjusting priorities and finding balance.

Watching Sunday’s sermon on the Hour of Power, part of Reverend Schuller’s message resonated with me. He explained how some people go through life saying “I can’t” and don’t take responsibility for their own life and actions. His children’s Kindergarten teacher did not permit the words “I can’t” in her classroom; only “I’ll try”.

Like the Kindergarten classroom, can’t was a four-letter word in my childhood home. Despite my cerebral palsy and its limitations, I was not to utter the words “I can’t”. My parents encouraged me to try and to do my best. Of course, performing brain surgery and running a marathon weren’t viable options for me; with everything else, I was expected to try. Once I attempted the task with sincere effort and found I couldn’t do it alone, my parents didn’t have any qualms about helping me or finding another way around so that I could do it alone.

Having this can do attitude has taken me far in life, often surprising others with what I can do and can accomplish. Occasionally, I have surprised myself, too! I share this story to illustrate:

The internet has opened a whole new world to me. I can finally communicate with others without my disability getting in the way. Oftentimes, others don’t even know I have a disability. If they do, they don’t know the extent of it. This means we can have more meaningful exchanges because we can bypass the misperceptions and misunderstandings of my cerebral palsy and get right to the topic at hand. It is such a liberating feeling! And, it is amazing who all I have connected with online.

Email, online conferences and discussion forums enable me to participate fully in the virtual world and to lead the exciting life of an online solopreneur. Although this technology means greater inclusion in participating in the virtual world, there is a risk of becoming further isolated from the real world. The very technology tools that allow me to be accepted into the world as an equal can also isolate me even more as I draw further and further into the “virtual world” with less and less “real life”, face-to-face contact with human beings.

In April 2005, I temporarily escaped Hermitsville when I was asked to speak at the Social Planning and Research Council of British Columbia’s (SPARC BC), “Beyond the Obvious: Exploring the Accessible Community Dialogue”. My initial thought was But I don’t give speeches. I can’t. Since I was raised without the word “can’t” in my vocabulary, that was a fleeing thought. I quickly turned my thought to How can I do this?

I had been using the free computer software ReadPlease for a couple of years to proofread my writing. ReadPlease reads aloud text that is copied into the program. I thought, Maybe I could put ReadPlease onto my laptop and have it read aloud my speech for me. I hesitantly agreed to speak. Unsure if the technology would work, I took a printed copy of the speech with me, in case I needed someone else to read it on my behalf.

Finally, it was my turn to take the stage. Being on stage alone for the first time in my life, with two hundred eyes staring at me, I wanted to run. But, I didn’t. I gave my speech. When I was done, I left the stage, trembling. I had given my first ever speech! And the technology worked!

You need to read my book I’ll Do It Myself to see what happened next!

The point is, had I said “I can’t” without even trying, I would have a missed this personally momentous experience and subsequent opportunities. I would not be doing my first internet radio show this coming Friday!

Also, by saying “I can’t” when asked to give that speech, I would have denied the other event attendees the opportunity to learn from my experience, which was the whole point of the dialogue. How selfish would that have been?

What are you denying yourself and others by saying you can’t do something before even attempting it? What might you accomplish if you banished the word can’t from your vocabulary? Share your thoughts by leaving a comment.